What the scriptures say about loneliness

• The male pigeon (retold by Bhishma)

  वृक्षमूलेऽपि दयिता यस्य तिष्ठति तद्गृहम् / प्रासादोपि तया हीनः कान्तार इति निश्चितम्

  vṛkṣamūle’pi dayitā yasya tiṣṭhati tadgṛham / prāsādopi tayā hīnaḥ kāntāra iti niścitam

  Where one's beloved is, even the foot of a tree is home. Without her, even a palace is a wilderness.

  Mahabharata · Shanti Parva · Bhishma: Apaddharma

  Spoken by the pigeon waiting through a storm for a mate who has not come home. our reading

• Meera

  हे री मैं तो प्रेम-दिवानी मेरो दरद न जाणै कोय। घायल की गति घायल जाणै, जो कोई घायल होय।

  he rī maiṃ to prem-divānī mero darad na jāṇai koy| ghāyal kī gati ghāyal jāṇai, jo koī ghāyal hoy|

  Friend, I am mad with love, and no one knows my pain. Only the wounded know what the wounded go through, only one who has been wounded.

  Meera pada "Mero darad na jane koy"

  Depicts pain no one around her understands. our reading

• Narrator

  सीय बिलोकि धीरता भागी। रहे कहावत परम बिरागी॥ लीन्हि रायँ उर लाइ जानकी। मिटी महामरजाद ग्यान की ॥

  sīy biloki dhīratā bhāgī| rahe kahāvat param birāgī|| līnhi rāyaṁ ur lāi jānakī| miṭī mahāmarajād gyān kī ||

  He was known as supremely detached, yet on seeing Sita his composure fled. The king held Janaki to his heart, and the great banks of his wisdom gave way.

  Ramcharitmanas · Bal Kand

  Holds her to his heart knowing she is leaving. our reading

• Narrator

  कतहुँ मुनिन्ह उपदेसहिं ग्याना। कतहुँ राम गुन करहिं बखाना॥ जदपि अकाम तदपि भगवाना। भगत बिरह दुख दुखित सुजाना ॥

  katahuṁ muninha upadesahiṃ gyānā| katahuṁ rām gun karahiṃ bakhānā|| jadapi akām tadapi bhagavānā| bhagat birah dukh dukhit sujānā ||

  Somewhere he taught knowledge to sages, somewhere he told of Ram's virtues. Though free of all desire, the wise Lord was pained by separation from his devotee.

  Ramcharitmanas, Bal Kand 72 (chaupai 1)

  Shows him wandering, teaching and singing, carrying her absence. our reading

• Kausalya

  देव पितर सब तुम्हहि गोसाईं। राखहुँ पलक नयन की नाईं॥ अवधि अंबु प्रिय परिजन मीना। तुम्ह करुनाकर धरम धुरीना ॥

  dev pitar sab tumhahi gosāīṃ| rākhahuṁ palak nayan kī nāīṃ|| avadhi aṃbu priy parijan mīnā| tumha karunākar dharam dhurīnā ||

  May all the gods and ancestors guard you, my lord, the way eyelids guard the eyes. The term of your exile is the water, and your loved ones are the fish in it; you are kind and steadfast in what is right.

  Ramcharitmanas, Ayodhya Kand 56 (chaupai 1)

  Depicts the fish left behind and the years of exile as water. our reading

• Krishna (message to Yashoda)

  नीके रहियो जसुमति मैया। आवैंगे दिन चारि पाँच में हम हलधर दोउ भैया॥ जा दिन तें हम तुमतें बिछुरे काहु न कह्यो 'कन्हैया'। कबहूँ प्रात न कियो कलेवा, साँझ न पीन्हीं धैया॥

  nīke rahiyo jasumati maiyā| āvaiṃge din cāri pāṁc meṃ ham haladhar dou bhaiyā|| jā din teṃ ham tumateṃ bichure kāhu na kahyo 'kanhaiyā'| kabahūṁ prāt na kiyo kalevā, sāṁjh na pīnhīṃ dhaiyā||

  Stay well, mother Yashoda. In four or five days we two brothers will come. Since the day I was parted from you, no one has called me "Kanhaiya". I have not had breakfast in the morning, nor warm milk at evening.

  Bhramargeet-Saar 10

  Shows no one uses the name only home used. our reading

• the gopis

  निसिदिन बरसत नैन हमारे। सदा रहति पावस ऋतु हम पै जब तें स्याम सिधारे॥

  nisidin barasat nain hamāre| sadā rahati pāvas ṛtu ham pai jab teṃ syām sidhāre||

  Night and day our eyes keep raining. Ever since Shyam went away, it is always the rainy season for us.

  Bhramargeet-Saar 316

  Tears have not stopped since he left. our reading

• Tulsidas (narrating)

  जननी निरखति बान-धनुहियाँ। बार-बार उर नैननि लावति प्रभुजूकी ललित पनहियाँ॥ कबहुँ प्रथम ज्यों जाइ जगावति कहि प्रिय बचन सँवारे। उठहु तात! बलि मातु बदनपर, अनुज-सखा सब द्वारे॥

  jananī nirakhati bān-dhanuhiyāṁ| bār-bār ur nainani lāvati prabhujūkī lalit panahiyāṁ|| kabahuṁ pratham jyoṃ jāi jagāvati kahi priy bacan saṁvāre| uṭhahu tāt! bali mātu badanapar, anuj-sakhā sab dvāre||

  The mother gazes at his little bow and arrows. Again and again she presses the Lord's small, lovely shoes to her heart and eyes. Sometimes, as before, she goes to wake him with tender words: "Get up, my child, your mother adores your face; your brothers and friends are all at the door."

  Gitavali

• Sita (message to Ram)

  स कुरुष्व महोत्साहां कृपां मयि नरर्षभ। त्वया नाथवती नाथ अनाथा इव दृश्यते॥

  sa kuruṣva mahotsāhāṃ kṛpāṃ mayi nararṣabha| tvayā nāthavatī nātha anāthā iva dṛśyate||

  Show me your great-hearted kindness, best of men. I have you, my protector, and yet I look like someone who has no one.

  Valmiki Ramayana, Sundara 38.32

• Good companysatsanga

  Find the friend; trees that stand together hold each other up. stated in the text

  Valmiki 3.72; 4.8; Vidura 36.62

• Surrenderśaraṇāgati

  Surrender is the companion of those who have no one. stated in the text

  Surdas; Tulsidas; Gita 9.18

• Remembrancesmarana

  Remembering is a kind of nearness. stated in the text

  Rahim; Valmiki 5.26

• Servicesevā

  Become a world for others. our reading

  Brihad 1.4.16; Gita 6.32

• Self-knowledgeātma-jñāna

  Never lost to me. stated in the text

  Gita 6.29-30; Shvetashvatara

• Krishna

  गतिर्भर्ता प्रभुः साक्षी निवासः शरणं सुहृत् । प्रभवः प्रलयः स्थानं निधानं बीजमव्ययम् ॥

  gatirbhartā prabhuḥ sākṣī nivāsaḥ śaraṇaṃ suhṛt | prabhavaḥ pralayaḥ sthānaṃ nidhānaṃ bījamavyayam ||

  I am the goal, the sustainer, the master, the witness, the home, the refuge and the friend; the origin and the dissolution, the ground, the treasure-house and the undying seed.

  Bhagavad Gita 9.18

  Shows the speaker as home, shelter and friend. our reading

• Surdas

  नाथ अनाथनि ही के संगी। दीनदयाल, परम करुनामय, जन-हित हरि बहु-रंगी ॥

  nāth anāthani hī ke saṃgī| dīnadayāl, param karunāmay, jan-hit hari bahu-raṃgī ||

  The Lord is the companion of exactly those who have no one: kind to the lowly, supremely compassionate, Hari who takes many forms for the good of his people.

  Sursagar vinay pada

  Having no one is the very condition he keeps company with. our reading

• Seer

  एको देवः सर्वभूतेषु गूढः सर्वव्यापी सर्वभूतान्तरात्मा। कर्माध्यक्षः सर्वभूताधिवासः साक्षी चेता केवलो निर्गुणश्च ॥

  eko devaḥ sarvabhūteṣu gūḍhaḥ sarvavyāpī sarvabhūtāntarātmā| karmādhyakṣaḥ sarvabhūtādhivāsaḥ sākṣī cetā kevalo nirguṇaśca ||

  One God is hidden in all beings: all-pervading, the inner self of every being, overseer of all action, dwelling in all beings, the witness, pure awareness, alone, beyond all qualities.

  Shvetashvatara Upanishad 6.11

  Shows no one is ever unaccompanied, the same one dwells in each. our reading

• Rahim

  रहिमन सुधि सबते भली, लगै जो बारम्बार। बिछुरे मानुष फिरि मिलैं, यहै जानि अवतार॥

  rahiman sudhi sabate bhalī, lagai jo bārambār| bichure mānuṣ phiri milaiṃ, yahai jāni avatār||

  Rahim says: remembering is best of all, when it comes again and again. People who were separated meet again; know that this is why God takes birth.

  Rahim doha 193

  Shows remembering keeps the parted close. our reading

• Tulsidas

  तुलसी राम कृपालु सों कहि सुनाउ गुन दोष। होय दूबरी दीनता परम पीन संतोष॥

  tulasī rām kṛpālu soṃ kahi sunāu gun doṣ| hoy dūbarī dīnatā param pīn saṃtoṣ||

  Tulsi, tell the kind Ram all of it, your good points and your faults. Your misery will grow thin and your contentment will grow full.

  Dohavali 96

• Krishna

  श्री भगवानुवाच भूय एव महाबाहो श्रृणु मे परमं वचः । यत्तेऽहं प्रीयमाणाय वक्ष्यामि हितकाम्यया ॥

  śrī bhagavānuvāca bhūya eva mahābāho śrṛṇu me paramaṃ vacaḥ | yatte’haṃ prīyamāṇāya vakṣyāmi hitakāmyayā ||

  Listen once more, mighty-armed, to my supreme word, which I will speak for your good, because you delight in it and are dear to me.

  Bhagavad Gita 10.1

  Shows someone wishes your good and says so. our reading

• Krishna

  सर्वगुह्यतमं भूयः श्रृणु मे परमं वचः । इष्टोऽसि मे दृढमिति ततो वक्ष्यामि ते हितम् ॥

  sarvaguhyatamaṃ bhūyaḥ śrṛṇu me paramaṃ vacaḥ | iṣṭo’si me dṛḍhamiti tato vakṣyāmi te hitam ||

  Hear once more my highest word, the most secret of all: you are deeply loved by me, and so I will tell you what is good for you.

  Bhagavad Gita 18.64

  Loved, and told so. our reading

• Bhartrihari

  विद्या नाम नरस्य रूपमधिकं प्रच्छन्नगुप्तं धनं विद्या भोगकरी यशस्सुखकरी विद्या गुरूणां गुरुः । विद्या बन्धुजनो विदेशगमने विद्या परा देवता विद्या राजसु पूजिता न तु धनं विद्याविहीनः पशुः ॥

  vidyā nāma narasya rūpamadhikaṃ pracchannaguptaṃ dhanaṃ vidyā bhogakarī yaśassukhakarī vidyā gurūṇāṃ guruḥ | vidyā bandhujano videśagamane vidyā parā devatā vidyā rājasu pūjitā na tu dhanaṃ vidyāvihīnaḥ paśuḥ ||

  Learning is a person's greater beauty, a hidden and guarded treasure. Learning brings enjoyment, fame and happiness; it is the teacher of teachers. In a foreign land learning is your kin; learning is the highest deity. Kings honour learning, not wealth. Without learning a person is little more than an animal.

  Bhartrihari · Niti Shatakam

  Far from home, what one knows keeps one company. our reading

• From the Mahabharata

  Markandeya and the child on the banyan leaf

  At the end of an age, the sage Markandeya drifts alone over a flooded world and sees a radiant child on a banyan branch. The child draws him inside his body, where he sees all the worlds, then asks if he has been resting, tired. Narayana explains he showed himself because he saw Markandeya's distress. Markandeya tells the Pandavas that this child is Krishna, sitting with them.

  When everything you knew is underwater, you have not been forgotten; you are being held.

• From the Mahabharata

  Nala and Damayanti

  King Nala, possessed by the spirit Kali, gambles away his kingdom to his brother and abandons Damayanti in the forest. Years of separation and disguise follow, until Nala masters the dice and the two are reunited.

  Compulsions can take everything. Loyalty and patience can still bring you home.

• From the Mahabharata

  Pingala's song: the night she stopped waiting

  Pingala waited all night for a lover who never came. At last she saw that her peace depended on someone else's arrival, let the expectation go, and slept peacefully.

  Letting go of an expectation can bring the sleep that waiting never will.

• From the Ramayana

  Ram says goodbye to his friends

  After six happy months, Ram sends his monkey and bear friends home with gifts. Angad, whose father is dead, begs to stay: Ram is his father and mother now. Ram embraces him and sends him on. To the boatman Guha he says: you are a brother to me; keep visiting.

  Friendships made in hard times deserve to be kept; say so out loud.

• Self-knowledgeआत्मज्ञानHeals loneliness
• ServiceसेवाHeals loneliness
• SurrenderशरणागतिHeals loneliness
• Attachmentसङ्गFeeds loneliness

See loneliness on the whole map